Is breaking up over text ever okay?

Then be clear and honest on what you do and why you don’t want to be a couple anymore. Go with a line like: “I realized that it was better for me not to continue going out with one day because I have the impression that we do not communicate well” (or whatever your reason) . Try not to blame them or criticize them – even if you really want, really – because it will make them feel defensive or angry, says Giolitti -Wright.

A little advice: you want to avoid defending yourself or overexplicating where you come from, she said. Even if you can assume that the verbal offers more closure, it does the opposite – and often degenerates in a convo or a heated argument in its own right. “Getting involved in a back and forth discussion does not promote the purpose, which is the goal of the text to start,” explains Giolitti-Wright. So some sentences will do the trick.

After that, share your new limits. Be precise on what they can expect from you concerning: contact it-know them if you are ready to continue talking or if you prefer to have space. Finally, finish your message on a compassionate note – has them so truly possible. A quick “I wish you all the best to go ahead” will do the trick, explains Giolitti-Wright.

You can also invite them to open and weigh, says Giolitti-Wright, as if you had a deep emotional link or want to remain friends. You can say, “Now you know what I feel, I would like to know what you feel if you want to share.” On the other hand, if you had a short adventure or if you are worried, things could do snowball in a not so funny text battle, you can probably ignore this step.

What if you’re still not sure what to say? Think about how you would like someone to cut links with you, says Dr Cope, and, in doubt, directs with compassion and empathy.

One last note: if you choose a text breaking out of fear for your safety, Dr Cope suggests keeping in mind some warnings. First of all, only include “as many details as what is necessary to communicate that the relationship is finished, without disclosing the personal details that can put [you] in danger. For example, “this relationship hurt me. I don’t want to see you again. If we see each other in public, I will not recognize you. After that, she recommends going without contact – so do not engage in an additional debate or do not keep the tab on them on social networks. Finally, do not be afraid to contact the defenders of domestic violence or the resources that can help in the event of a degence.