Office affairs are more common than you think. Here’s why

There is generally nothing Also Scandalous about Kiss Cams. In other words, until the Jumbotron of a recent Coldplay concert highlights a soft and cuddly couple who turned out to be a CEO and a director of people in his business, would have caught mid-album while they were rushing to dodge the cameras.

You can assume that office affairs are only tabloid tropes – the kind of thing that only happens to high -level personalities. Not everyday people like you or me. And that makes sense: cheating is a betrayal that people generally go to great efforts to hide … So why risk all your relationship (not to mention your work) by connecting with someone who is not only all day, but who could also be friendly with your loved one?

“Unfortunately, business is more common than most of us would not wish [to think]And colleagues are in fact the most common business partners I have seen, ”explains Kathy Nickerson, PHD, clinical psychologist specializing in the recovery of infidelity and author of The courage to stay: how to cure a matter and save your marriage. “What I have seen over 25 years in practice is that more generally, business works as a kind of emotional pain relievers to escape a deep distress”, be it loneliness in their current relationship, their low self -esteem or its professional exhaustion.

Whatever the reasons, the therapists of infidelity say that cheating with a colleague, in particular, is a recurring problem brought in their sessions.

Here’s why office business is so common

There is a reason why the Romance Patron and Employee trope has become such a general public cliché. “It is true that very taboo nature can be intoxicating,” explains Patrice Le Goy, PHD, LMFT, therapist of couples based in Los Angeles with expertise in business resumption. For some, “knowing that you keep this a secret not only of your partner, but in this case, also your colleagues, can increase excitation in the situation.”

There are also simpler factors in play, such as the pure convenience of being with this person so often. “This is called the proximity effect,” explains Dr. Nickerson. “We are attracted to those we see more often, which is why this familiarity and this comfort can quickly become more intimate.” Add to that the integrated camaraderie of shared stress on the coming deadlines, for example, and the daily triumphs of a project have gone well – and you have a “team” link which can imitate the real romantic proximity.